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Sunday, 1 January 2012
Friday, 4 November 2011
Gratitude
Dear all
Despite the misery here at present I am really grateful to all whom I have been in contact with this week. Margaret, thanks for the lovely coffee's out and about in town and for coming to the hospital with me yesterday. Miriam, my beautiful daughter for producing another joy for us all to behold and watch growing up ( Isla Elizabeth). To Joseph and Gracie for always bringing joy to my life and making Grandma laugh out loud. James without you I would have none of this. Eternally grateful.
To my wonderful sister-in-law, Frany for the listening ear and the wise words. Thanks Fran. To Colette, my favourite niece for her openess and honesty and her two beautiful girls Freyja and Fleur. Of course without Paul they both would not have been here so thanks for that Paul and Happy 40th in 2012. Last but not least to my husband for putting up with all the problems that have arisen and dealing with them honestly.
All my other friends, thanks for the support, especially Pat, Toni, Sylvia Fiona, Liz, Ella,Kathleen, Fay and Lydia. I love you all.
To my Irish cousins Liz and Tom,Lizzy and Anne-Marie, Mark and Sean (down under) Love you all very much.
I really need to write this stuff to keep me in an attitiude of gratitude, for there is such a lot to be grateful for in spite of everything.
Love from me.
Despite the misery here at present I am really grateful to all whom I have been in contact with this week. Margaret, thanks for the lovely coffee's out and about in town and for coming to the hospital with me yesterday. Miriam, my beautiful daughter for producing another joy for us all to behold and watch growing up ( Isla Elizabeth). To Joseph and Gracie for always bringing joy to my life and making Grandma laugh out loud. James without you I would have none of this. Eternally grateful.
To my wonderful sister-in-law, Frany for the listening ear and the wise words. Thanks Fran. To Colette, my favourite niece for her openess and honesty and her two beautiful girls Freyja and Fleur. Of course without Paul they both would not have been here so thanks for that Paul and Happy 40th in 2012. Last but not least to my husband for putting up with all the problems that have arisen and dealing with them honestly.
All my other friends, thanks for the support, especially Pat, Toni, Sylvia Fiona, Liz, Ella,Kathleen, Fay and Lydia. I love you all.
To my Irish cousins Liz and Tom,Lizzy and Anne-Marie, Mark and Sean (down under) Love you all very much.
I really need to write this stuff to keep me in an attitiude of gratitude, for there is such a lot to be grateful for in spite of everything.
Love from me.
The misery of Alzheimers disease
A few months ago we had a diagnosis of this terrible disease for Mother who was 95 on 8th October 2011.
I am alone with this stranger every day until she is tired enough to sleep and get some respite from her torment. It is depressing to see your mother alter dramatically before your eyes and be helpless. She has lived with me for 18 years and this seems so cruel. What a way to end such a long and healthy life. She is in hospital for the moment getting the medication sorted out. I do not see any light at the end of this tunnel. My crafting mojo is completely gone! Tiredness descends like a heavy veil every day. I pray that God will take her soon so that she can be relieved of this burden and be with the angels!
I am alone with this stranger every day until she is tired enough to sleep and get some respite from her torment. It is depressing to see your mother alter dramatically before your eyes and be helpless. She has lived with me for 18 years and this seems so cruel. What a way to end such a long and healthy life. She is in hospital for the moment getting the medication sorted out. I do not see any light at the end of this tunnel. My crafting mojo is completely gone! Tiredness descends like a heavy veil every day. I pray that God will take her soon so that she can be relieved of this burden and be with the angels!
Thursday, 15 April 2010
Something I created at last!
Saturday, 6 February 2010
From a newsletter from Martha Borst)
We left off with Lancelot pondering the predicament of: "During the day, did he want a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments.
What would YOU do?"
Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.
Now of course the joke ending is:
"If you don't let a woman have her own way, things will get ugly!"
But a more enlightened quote might be . . .
"Only those who respect the personality of others can be of real use to them"
There is a lot of wisdom in Lancelot's decision. When we try to manipulate or control others, overtly or covertly, women or men; thinking that we know what is best for them better than they do, inevitably things will backfire. No one likes to be "told" what to do. No wants to work for or live with someone who doesn't respect their right and ability to make good decisions. This is most especially true for children. How do they learn if others make decisions for them?
Perhaps a more effective approach with children would be to help them sort out the choices in front of them. Discuss the pros and cons of each decision and then allow them to make their own choices. They will either reap the rewards or pay the consequences. If they fail, acknowledge them for being willing to take a step and simply ask them what they learned.
With a spouse or a friend, perhaps what is more empowering than our judgments and criticisms or our attempts to persuade them in a direction we think they should take, would be to help them sort through their options (if they are willing to do so), and tell them you trust they will make the right choice for them. Don't offer unwanted advice or tell them what they should do. After all, it is their life, not yours. If they fail, then stand beside them and let them know you believe in them. Tell them "It'll be better next time." Simply give them your support and never say, "I told you so."
The same is true for employees. Clearly, if you're in a leadership position, you have a greater right to determine what the choices are and sometimes it's "do the job as required or leave." But otherwise, it's been my experience that many times, my employees saw choices I never did, (I always tried to hire people who were smarter then I), and I was often impressed by their decisions.
When you truly respect someone, then you respect their ability to not only make their own decisions, but you also trust their ability to recover from any mistakes made, learn the lesson and move on.
Amazing things happen when people know they are completely supported to make a free choice. Have a great weekend!
-Albert Schweitzer
There is a lot of wisdom in Lancelot's decision. When we try to manipulate or control others, overtly or covertly, women or men; thinking that we know what is best for them better than they do, inevitably things will backfire. No one likes to be "told" what to do. No wants to work for or live with someone who doesn't respect their right and ability to make good decisions. This is most especially true for children. How do they learn if others make decisions for them?
Perhaps a more effective approach with children would be to help them sort out the choices in front of them. Discuss the pros and cons of each decision and then allow them to make their own choices. They will either reap the rewards or pay the consequences. If they fail, acknowledge them for being willing to take a step and simply ask them what they learned.
With a spouse or a friend, perhaps what is more empowering than our judgments and criticisms or our attempts to persuade them in a direction we think they should take, would be to help them sort through their options (if they are willing to do so), and tell them you trust they will make the right choice for them. Don't offer unwanted advice or tell them what they should do. After all, it is their life, not yours. If they fail, then stand beside them and let them know you believe in them. Tell them "It'll be better next time." Simply give them your support and never say, "I told you so."
The same is true for employees. Clearly, if you're in a leadership position, you have a greater right to determine what the choices are and sometimes it's "do the job as required or leave." But otherwise, it's been my experience that many times, my employees saw choices I never did, (I always tried to hire people who were smarter then I), and I was often impressed by their decisions.
When you truly respect someone, then you respect their ability to not only make their own decisions, but you also trust their ability to recover from any mistakes made, learn the lesson and move on.
Amazing things happen when people know they are completely supported to make a free choice. Have a great weekend!
Tuesday, 26 January 2010
Camelot? What would you do
"Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.
The question?. . .What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.
He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.
Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.
The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!
Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.
He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:
What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her own life.
Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.
The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened.
The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.
Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day....or night?
Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?
What would YOU do?"
Friday, 22 January 2010
Hello everyone. Well it seems a lot of time has passed since the last rendition. Gracie is now three years old and doing very well. A big change from the poorly sick little girl of this time last year. We are truely grateful for that. Once again the attitude of gratitude raises its profile in my thoughts. I had been without my car for 5 weeks and really missed it, although the amount of snow we had on the ground here, it was probably a blessing that I didn't have to drive in it. The fact that it was still under manufacturer's warranty when it decided to give up the ghost is also something to be grateful for, it only had three days to go before it ran out! It would probably have cost an arm and a leg to pay for the repair that took 5 weeks. The down side is that I did not get out to walk for fear of falling on the icy pavements and roads so I put on half a stone in weight.( Ate lots of biscuits and drank lots of coffee) Putting that to rights now!. In three weeks we will be going away to see out grandchildren and mother will go into the local nursing home while we are away. A break from the 24/7 caring role will be good for me and help me relax.
Something I would like to share with you today is this quote. How true it is. Love to you all today. I wish you all peace and tranquility today and always.
"There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than there is for bread."
Mother Theresa
Image courtsey of www.aimeeasher.com
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